College Fears

High school life seems like it is rapidly coming to an end. That means only one thing; college life begins shortly after. I've felt my stress level escalate tremendously within the past few weeks. People have told that I've become sort of like a ticking bomb, I could explode at any moment. I don't intend to come off as rude or snappy towards others, but lately fear and stress has taken control of me. I feel a weight on my shoulders. My future is slapping me in the face every day asking me what I plan on doing next year.
College. That's my plan. But where? For the few months, I was extremely interested in attending Montana State University in the fall. Last night, my parents and I attended a meet and greet at Round Table with an admissions representative from MSU. As she was talking about the school activities, living arrangements, and the state itself, I was pumped thinking, "this is my number one choice." However, my outlook on this dream school changed drastically as she started discussing the academics. I realized that there were not as many courses for criminal justice or for any law and law enforcement. I want to study criminal justice and even though I love the Montana State campus and all that goes with it, I decided that this school was not what I was looking for.
After the meeting, my parents began listing multiple colleges where they think I should attend and my head started spinning. There's all these options for me and I have to make the final decision. I can't depend on my mom to tell me what to do anymore or to help me make my decisions. I have to do it all by myself. To me, that frightens me. I'm so comfortable with the idea that I can depend on her, yet now, as I get older, I have to learn how to make decisions for myself and what I want.
In the summer of 2012, I had the privilege of attending the Junior Statesman Achievement program and take a Constitutional Law course while living on the Stanford University campus. I had the chance to live by myself and make my own decisions. I felt like an actual college student, but I wasn't. My mom called every morning to make sure I was awake, ready for class, getting along with my classmates and dorm-mates, and eating three meals a day. She put money on my debit card whenever I ran out or wanted to by something that was expensive. It was like I was home. I fear that I will have a difficult time adjusting to actual college life because I'm not going to have my mom making sure I'm doing everything that I am doing. College, please don't be too much of a challenge.